Romantic Comedy in Verse

And now for something completely different :). Today I thought I'd share some bits and pieces of poetry that have made me laugh - or at least smile with tragic understanding :).  Let me know if any of them make you laugh (or cry!) and why!

Story by Dorothy Parker

'And if he's gone away,' said she,
'Good riddance, if you're asking me.
I'm not a one to lie awake
And weep for anybody's sake.
There's better lads than him about!
I'll wear my buckled slippers out
A-dancing till the break of day.
I'm better off with him away!
And if he never come,' said she,
'Now what on earth is that to me?
I wouldn't have him back!'
I hope
Her mother washed her mouth with soap.

Txt me my darling by Expicurious

My phone subscription will renew
But I can't contain my Love 4U
My facia's the height of fashion
My keypad rattles with great passion

I need a bit of SMS
If only to relieve the stress
I'll type a ;>) with sexy lashes
Hot Love tonight - In dots and dashes

Text me tonight - Oh, Text me harder!
Or I'll get bored and raid the larder
Text me my darling – O please B mine
O Text me where the sun don't shine!

It's more exciting at peak rates
Please Please B quick - my phone awaits!
Text me my precious - with skill and grace
(I'll OGSM in uppercase)


Habitation by Margaret Atwood

Marriage is not
a house or even a tent
it is before that, and colder:
The edge of the forest, the edge
of the desert
the unpainted stairs
at the back where we squat
outside, eating popcorn
where painfully and with wonder
at having survived even
this far
we are learning to make fire

The Owl and the Pussycat by Edward Lear

The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea
In a beautiful pea green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
'O lovely Pussy! O Pussy my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are!'

II
Pussy said to the Owl, 'You elegant fowl!
How charmingly sweet you sing!
O let us be married! too long we have tarried:
But what shall we do for a ring?'
They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the Bong-tree grows
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood
With a ring at the end of his nose,
His nose,
His nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose.

III
'Dear pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling
Your ring?' Said the Piggy, 'I will.'
So they took it away, and were married next day
By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince, and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a runcible spoon;
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,
They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.